Is treating childbirth pain moral? Does labor have to be painful? What about the “pain free childbirth” or hypnobirthing movement? What about orgasmic birth? We’ll talk about all that and more today.
If you’re like the average pregnant woman in America, you’re probably getting targeted with ads related to pregnancy and childbirth every time you’re online. I remember specifically getting targeted for ads from the Mighty Mama Movement.
Terms like “pain free childbirth,” “hypnobirthing,” and “orgasmic birth” can be super intriguing. Let’s talk about them one at a time.
Is it wrong to get an epidural?
First of all, there is no shame in getting an epidural. And there is no inherent spiritual benefit to having a natural labor. Please understand that.
I’ve heard some Christians bring up the argument that God cursed women with the pain of childbirth at the fall, and that using pain medication during labor circumvents that curse. It’s true that pain in childbearing is part of the curse (Genesis 3:16). However, so is illness and death. As a nurse, I don’t refuse to set a broken bone, give medication for a fever, or treat cancer because it was part of the curse.
As medical professionals, we use the knowledge God has given us to care for people made in God’s image. And then we realize that even our best treatment is only a poor representation of the restoration God has promised he will bring about.
As Christians, our salvation is based on Christ’s taking the penalty for our sin, not on how well we endure the pain of living in a broken world. Going through natural childbirth does not make you any more spiritual or any more holy than anyone else.
Both unmedicated childbirth and medicated childbirth are miracles in a broken world. Both are evidence of God’s mercy. Neither is something to boast about, since we find our value in Christ’s sacrifice on our behalf.
You can find a great article by Gloria Furman about a theological view of childbirth here. For a more in-depth study, Gloria’s book Labor with Hope is a great read.
Why choose an unmedicated birth?
If an epidural is so easily available, why choose an unmedicated birth? Here are some of the benefits:
- Lower risk of side effects
- Lower risk of having to use interventions
- Greater freedom to move around during labor
- Faster healing
- Labor generally goes more quickly
- Better breastfeeding
- More choices about where birth can happen (this was the deciding factor for me. I wanted an out-of-hospital birth)
What about the Pain Free Childbirth Movement?
Most pain free childbirth educators focus on teaching several key things, including:
- hypnobirthing (we’ll discuss this one in a lot of detail)
- education/empowering
- breathing excercises/relaxation
- redefining terms and providing imagery
Christian Perspective of Hypnobirthing
Hypnobirthing includes meditation and relaxation. Neither of these are inherently wrong. In fact, both meditation and relaxation are commanded in the Bible throughout the psalms and in the practice of Sabbath.
However, modern meditation practices are closely linked to ancient Hindi and New Age practices, and meditation is often described as a way to “become one with the universe” or “one with yourself.” In both Hindi and New Age thinking, meditation is a way to transcend reality and become your own god, or godlike. This, clearly, is not Biblical.
If your heart’s goal in meditating is to become your own savior, or to be your own god, then it’s wrong. However, Biblical meditation focuses on enjoying God, His mercy, His goodness, and His holiness.
Many women tend to describe “spacing out” in long labors, especialy if they give birth in a quiet, relaxed environment. It’s a calm patience as you labor to get your baby out. It’s something that God gives our brains to help us cope with labor pain. You can relax and go into that quiet state without New Age meditatation or trying to transcend reality.
Other components of pain free childbirth education
Most painfree childbirth courses also offer a lot of education. This is the great part about these courses. They present childbirth as a natural process, something that your body is designed to do. They show mother and fathers how to work together to relax. Once clients understand the birth process and what to expect, they tend to be much less anxious. This factor alone makes a HUGE difference in birth experiences.
Breathing excercises can be very helpful as well in promoting relaxation. They can also help the mother to feel more in control, as well as help to push more effectively. Relaxation is super, super important in nonmedicated labor, as this article points out.
Finally, many of these courses tend to redefine terms. “Pain” is relabeled as “pressure” and “contractions” become “waves” or “surges.” In this way, it is technically possible to have a “pain-free” birth. Advocates and educators say that redefining terms allows parents to face birth with less anxiety and more of an understanding of birth as a natural process. Educators often tend to use imagery as well; “imagine your baby like a balloon floating down out of your uterus with each contraction.”
What about Orgasmic Birth?
I’ve seen stories online about “orgasmic birth,” where the act of giving birth itself is erotically pleasurable. The Orgasmic Birth movement describes it as “joyous, sensuous, and revolutionary”, and women are invited to “see the emotional, spiritual, and physical heights attainable through birth.”
Orgasmic birth is technically a broad definition: from births that moms describe as “ecstatic,” to births where moms describe the actual feelings and contractions of sexual climax as the baby crowns.
Most women don’t experience literal orgasms during birth. Some, however, do. I have a good friend who is a midwife, and she has seen it happen occasionally in the home birth setting. Other medical professionals go their entire careers without ever witnessing an orgasmic birth.
I think it’s important to realize that literally orgasmic birth happens so rarely that most of us wouldn’t even know it’s a thing unless we had seen it on the internet. It’s not something that’s commonly experienced, so it’s not likely to happen to our moms, our sisters, or our friends. Seeing it on the internet can make it seem like a super common thing, but it’s not. It only happens about 0.3% of the time, according to this article.
However, many women have ecstatic, empowering births. Quite often, women experience the oxytocin and endophin “high” after birth that’s also experienced at orgasm. The hormone rush is designed to help you bond with your baby, just like that orgasm helps you bond with your husband.
Factors for a Literally Orgasmic Birth
One of the biggest components to a literally orgasmic birth is viewing birth as a sexual process. It’s true that the baby is traveling through your cervix and vagina. It will be putting pressure on some of the most sensitive areas of your body. Just like as in any sexual experience, the brain is the biggest sex organ. So, if “birth” and “sexy” are synonymous to you, it’s more likely to happen.
The second factor is the hormones that are rushing through your body as you give birth. Oxytocin levels are super high during labor and birth, which is also the hormone responsible for the feelings of orgasm. This is one reason that the emotional “high” that naturally happens right after delivery is so pronounced. Third, each person’s anatomy can make a big difference.
If you’d like to learn more, you can check out this article and this one.
Christian Perspective of Orgasmic Birth
Since orgasmic birth is such a broad category, let’s differentiate a little bit. Some women experience literal orgasms as they deliver their child, while others have a good birth experience and have an ecstatic hormone rush immediately after delivery. Both are good things.
However, there are instances where women intentionally stimulate themselves during labor (or ask their husbands to do so) in the hopes of experiencing an orgasmic birth.
As a Christian approaching this conversation, it’s important to remember that sex is a gift from God, reserved for marriage. It’s given for pleasure (the ENTIRE book of Song of Solomon) and reproduction (Genesis 1:28). While the Bible doesn’t speak directly about sexual pleasure during childbirth, there are some basic principles that apply.
First, sexuality is something that should be enjoyed purely between you and your husband (Hebrews 13:4). On the other hand, childbirth can be a very non-private experience. Even if you’re someone who is generally very private, you may find yourself completely comfortable with the idea of being exposed during active labor.
Sexuality is not given as a pain control method, coping mechanism, or a survival technique. Guard your intimacy and save sexual stimulation for when you and your husband are alone.
Second, the language of orgasmic birth often includes things like “the emotional, physical, and spiritual heights attainable through birth.” While this is not inherently bad, the orgasmic birth movement is closely linked to the New Age idea of transcendence. It’s the idea of becoming god-like. If you do explore this option, please be aware of this.
Finally, you should not have intercourse if your waters have already broken. It can cause infection for mom and baby.
That being said, if you want to try some sexual stimulation during early stages of labor, do it! When you’re alone with your husband, go for it! Try kissing, slow dancing, or nipple stimulation if you’d like. Get that oxytocin flowing.
Conclusion
Many of these birth courses have really great pointers. Relaxation, education, free movement, facing birth without fear – these are all very important themes. But many of them have New-Age or transcendence foundations.
It’s important to think through all of this in light of the Gospel. Make sure you’re equipped to take the good stuff and leave the harmful stuff in these classes.